Friday, August 27, 2010

What day is it?

So, I "lost" my point and shoot, missed T.I.L.T.
have a load of housework and a to do list that is growing by the second, but there was nothing more important than a special someone's 5th birthday yesterday.
This was always going to be a bittersweet celebration and a string of too many firsts without someone special, but it was still a celebration none the less.

 

We wrapped up 5 special presents for the birthday girl and I made more than 40 cupcakes for her "party". The kids all but snorted the ice cream cake and everyone had (last minute) lollie boxes to take home.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEL BELL

WE LOVE YOU XOXO





Thursday, August 19, 2010

T.I.L.T.


Things I Love Thursday



Lovin' Rachel Zoe's new shoot for Harper's Bazaar.
Lovin' Marc in a kilt even more
Hurry up Foxtel and start airing The Rachel Zoe Project!!

What are you lovin' today?

Monday, August 16, 2010

Point and shoot and shoot again


So in the interest of getting on with things I have a couple of point and shoots to catch up on.

Friday night we had some things to do and loving a good multi-task decided that dinner and organisation could be done together. So off we trotted, shopping and dinner at IKEA.
Yup we sure are fancy!!!!
While there the kidlets decided they should test out ALL the furniture they possibly could.
Am thinking of renting them out.
KIDS FOR HIRE able to test furniture durabilty. Try before you buy!!!

I love a bit of last minute planning and found myself doing a cupcake workshop with one of my besties on Saturday morning.
The lovely Cathie from melbourne epicure was our teacher and she was ACE.
I have brought some of her goodies at various markets before (Pear tart YUMMO!!!)
so I knew we would be in for a treat, and right I was.
It was all about decorating, as far as I'm concerned a good icing can turn an average cake into the best ever. We made all the fondant decorations and I think I may be at least one step closer to being able to use a piping bag like a pro.
I am proud to say that these cupcakes made it all the way home without me even being tempted to sample just a little bit. That is probably more to do with sampling the cream cheese icing tests, than willpower.
My will power wasn't so strong when we stopped at the baking shop on the way home though.
I walked into the shop with a set limit in my mind. A quick trip to the ATM across the round and I doubled my limit within 3 minutes and then to top it off I parted with some more money today as I get totally professional with an oven thermometer and a "proper" piping set.
Needless to say I can't wait for the next round of birthdays to show off my skills!!!

Getting on with it, not getting over it


Write delete, rewrite delete again.
I've had moments over the last two weeks where I could write for hours as tears have flown. It has felt therapeutic. Then the moment passes and I don't want to share my thoughts. At all, with anyone. And I wonder how much I want to share in the wide open space of the world wide web.
I thought about deleting my previous post and hiding away as my family rallies together to get through this time. Then I want to write everything.
Where, why, how.
I want to write the questions, especially those that can't be answered.

I have no shame in crying, geez I cry watching most TV shows (damn you Chuck Bass). I also have no shame in laughing as we remember stupid things.
I have done a lot of both in the last few days.
But there is a point, after losing a loved one, that you have to start living your life again. Meals have to be cooked, clothes need to be washed and bills have to be paid. Then guilt feels like it is creeping over your grief. There will also be a point at which I will have to slow down and stop keeping myself busy.
I'm sure there will also be a point that I will be able to watch the news without feeling anxious about any reports of car accidents.
Before it affects you the road toll is just numbers. You may think about the tragedy for a moment, but that report is usually followed by a light hearted funny animal story and your thought process has switched. When one of your loved ones is included in that toll it changes everything.

As time goes by things may get easier, there will be less crying in the shower, certain songs will bring smiles rather than tears and memories will come easily rather than trying to force myself to remember moments.

So as all cliches ring through my head it's now time to get on with it.
But we'll never get over it.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Ciao for now


The first time we met I had just stepped of a 26 hour flight from the UK .
I heard that you were really nervous to met for the first time and you had good reason.
As soon as I spotted you I saw the cheek in your eyes, and you had the look on your face like the cat that stole the cream, after all in my absence you had knocked up my lil sister.
You were the bogan in the trackie pants hangin' for a fag, I was the freak wearing a cowboy hat over my black and pink hair.
In the time I was away my family of four had grown into 5 as my parents treated you like their own and in a split second you went from being a complete stranger to my brother (and tormentor).
A week later that family grew to 6 when we welcomed one of the greatest joys of my life. Jemma Dorothy.
It's no secret that you took to fatherhood like a duck to water, which was pretty lucky seeing that Abby Reese arrived 4 years later with Bella Charlotte only 2 years behind. You couldn't crack it for a boy but wouldn't have had it any other way.
So you weren't perfect, either am I as you would be reminding me as even now I procrastinate over writing this.
You were a perfect Dad though and an amazing Uncle. I hope I always remember the look of pure joy on your face when Sadie learnt to say your name and then continue to say it over and over because she new you were laughing at her.
"Wonald Wonald Wonald"
I promise she will know how much you adored her, just like we will tell your beautiful girls every day how much you loved them.
I could go on for days but you'd be over all this "sappy shit" by now.
So mutha fucka I guess it's ciao for now.
I'll make sure your cupboards are full of malteasers and biscuits and that ice cream is always eaten straight from the tub. More importantly I will always be there for all your girls.

"Catch You Fuckers at A Bad Time"

Ronald Stuart Page
07/03/1978 - 01/08/2010
R.I.P.